*DISCLAIMER*

Warning: Java compilation error. Insufficient coffee. Due to this, none of the characters, situations and sites belong to the authors of this story. They are currently just used to explore the effects of sleep deprivation.

Tail Kinker and Kitsy present

*Magical Girl Pretty Ruri*

Episode Sixteen:

Magical Girl Scramble

The alarm clock rang.

This was such an unexpected event that Ruri nearly missed it. She sat upright and glared at the offending piece of machinery.

"Good morning, Ruri!"

Hoshino Usagi burst through the door and flipped on the light. Ruri reached over and switched off the alarm, then looked closer at the alarm clock.

"Seven-thirty...it worked." She shook her head in wonder. "On a schoolday, no less!"

Ruri hopped out of bed and grabbed some clothes from the dresser. She turned and ran for the bathroom...then slowed herself forcefully.

"I don't need to rush...I have an hour and a half before I even have to be at school!"

She took her time in the bath, and when she got downstairs, she was scrubbed till she glowed, fully and properly dressed, her bookbag was packed, her homework complete and intact, and had even had a chance to alter her hairstyle slightly - and she still had half an hour until Megumi was due to arrive.

Usagi glanced over as Ruri came down the stairs.

"Breakfast is on!"

Ruri nodded, and sat at the table. She noted with amusement that all she could see of her father was his knuckles around the edge of the newspaper. She grinned. She hadn't actually seen her father at the breakfast table since her first day here. Usually, he was on a job site by six in the morning. Well before Ruri usually even considered waking up. And certainly beyond when she actually managed to wake up.

Her mother set a bowl of soup in front of her.

"Ano...Mom?"

"What is it, Ruri?"

Ruri indicated the bowl. "Soup for breakfast?"

"Of course, Ruri. What would you expect?"

Ruri reconsidered. In the creche, she had always had either bacon and eggs, or cold cereal. In fact, she'd suspected that the creche had had some sort of arrangement with Kellog's, since the only cold cereal they ever had was Corn Flakes. But after six years in the creche, and all her breakfasts since being pretty much the same...

"Never mind. Soup is fine."

Usagi looked at her oddly. "Ruri, you've always had soup and rice for breakfast before. When you made it to breakfast. What's different about today?"

"It's nothing, Mom." She sipped the soup.

Her eyes widened in surprise. She swallowed, and stared at the bowl in surprise.

Her mother grinned. "I got tired of the same old instant soup every morning. So this morning...I decided to spice it up a bit."

Ruri gulped down the rest of the bowl in one swift movement, then held it out to her mother. "More, please?"

*DING*DONG*

"Now, who could that be?" Her mother stood up. "I'll get it."

"Mom...you're starting to scare me."

Hoshino Hikaru - her father - rustled his newspaper.

"Good morning, Dad."

To her surprise, her father set down the paper. "Good morning, Princess."

Ruri blinked.

"It's good to see you actually making it to breakfast."

"Ano..." Ruri was suddenly at a loss. She'd never really interacted with her "father", due to his busy work schedule. Heck, he even worked on Sunday!

Her father grinned. "Perhaps you'd like to do something Saturday afternoon, to celebrate the end of the school season. Perhaps we could go horseback riding?"

"Ummm...That would be nice."

"We could even have a small picnic, near the fish hatcheries."

Ruri's bowl hit the floor and spun several times before coming to a halt. Luckily, she'd emptied it first.

Hikaru chuckled. "Best close your mouth, or you'll look like a fish yourself."

Fortunately, she was saved from having to comment. Her mother wandered in, Megumi in tow. Megumi was giggling.

"Wow, I would never have believed it!"

"Yes, it even surprised me."

Ruri sighed. "Maybe I should go back to being late. It would be less of a strain for everyone else."

* * * * *

"Ruri! I have some interesting news for--"

Ruri glanced over her shoulder, to see Inez and Yurika walking up to them. "Sorry, Ai. No time. I'll be late for school."

"But if you'll just let me explain...I've detected some strong probability fields around our adversaries, and even stronger--"

Ruri scowled. "I said, I don't have time! Leave me alone!" Ruri broke into a run, dragging Megumi along with her.

Yurika blinked. "That's not like her at all, Ai. I've never heard her snap like that."

Ai bit her lip.

"I wonder what set her off like that?" wondered Yurika.

"My guess is that the stress of being here is starting to get to her."

Yurika frowned, puzzled. "What stress? I mean, she's got everything she wants here. A real family, a chance for a real life...My Akito..."

"Everything?" Ai sighed. "How about some peace and quiet? Every time she turns around, there's some horrible monster popping up for us to smash down. How about some normalcy? Turning into a Magical Girl is hardly normal, now, is it?"

"Hey, I wouldn't mind it so much..."

Inez blinked. "Yurika..."

"Huh?"

"Never mind." She shook her head. "Consider that for the last two weeks, she's never managed to make it to school on time, her classwork has sucked, and even her speech patterns have changed dramatically. Despite her obvious attempts to prevent that." Finally given a chance to give an explanation, Inez was in full swing. "On top of that, she's been yanked out of a sterile environment that she was used to, dropped into another environment without warning, and seen two of her friends - us - reduced to her age." Ai sighed. "Not to mention having to watch another friend of hers die. Again. So whatever she's gained out of this..."

Yurika nodded. "I guess so."

Ai turned to her. "You're the Captain, Captain. You should try to cheer her up somehow."

Yurika snapped to attention, a grin on her face. "Of course! I'll help her get out of this place. And get us out as well. And I'll set everything right..." She paused, then glanced back over to Ai. "Ummm...Any ideas on how to do that?"

* * * * *

"Well, Mie, that was a brilliant plan you had. In fact, the only real problem with it was, it FAILED!"

The room was dark, the walls lined with shelves of books. Against one wall was a massive oaken desk with a single lantern casting feeble illumination. Seated at the desk, his feet thrown up and resting on a large book, Genichiro scowled at Mie.

Mie shrugged. "Hey, what do you want for a plot taken from a cartoon?"

"Well, we're back at square one." He glared at the small crystal Eye sitting on the desk. "What else did you learn from your research?"

"Losers like you will never win."

Genichiro jumped to his feet. In one catlike move, he drew his sword and placed the tip at her throat.

"Would you care to rephrase that, my dear?"

Mie placed a finger on the tip of the sword and casually pushed it away. "I would recommend you rethink that. You couldn't afford the repercussions." She smiled cutely. "I am, after all, Prince Akara's favourite."

Genichiro scowled, and sheathed the sword. "Speak. Or, if you have nothing worth saying...leave."

"Food."

"Eh? Genichiro scowled. "In the kitchens. Don't try to distract me from the task at hand."

Mie frowned. "We have kitchens here?" She shrugged. "No matter. My research has indicated that all Magical Girls - hell, all teenage human girls - have a decided weakness for food."

"Excellent. We can invade the ice cream parlor--"

Mie shook her head. "That would probably work. Except that we've already tried something like that. Tsukumo invaded a grocery store. Plus, we can't guarantee we'll get her. No, I have a better idea in mind."

"What?"

"Her school."

* * * * *

"Good morning, boys and girls!" Uribitake-sensei sauntered into the classroom, dropped himself into the chair, and threw his feet up onto the desk. "Take your seats, and let's get this roll-call thingy out of the way."

Ruri blinked. "Who's that?"

"Lean...It's the homeroom teacher."

"But..." Ruri shook her head. "Right. I'm just used to seeing Nakaguri-sensei first."

"Of course. This is the first time you've been on time in two weeks."

Ruri sighed. "Yeah..."

Uribitake-sensei reached her name in the roll. "Hoshino."

"Present."

"There's a first. Ikari." He continued with the roll.

Ruri sighed again. The problem wasn't really getting up on time. It was recovering from all the times she hadn't.

* * * * *

The sakura tree was in full bloom, the petals blowing throughout the schoolyard. Ruri sat down under the tree and opened her bento.

"Lean. Konnichi-wa, Ruri-chan!"

Ruri glanced up, to see Shiratori Yukina leaning over her.

"Mind if I join you?"

Ruri shrugged. "It's okay with me."

"Thanks. Sit!"

Ruri looked at her oddly.

"What?"

"I always meant to ask you...Why do you always say what you're doing?"

Yukina frowned in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"Just now, you said `sit'."

"No, I didn't."

Ruri stared at her. "Yes, you did."

"Blink. No..."

Ruri sighed. "Never mind." She grabbed her chopsticks and dug into her bento.

Yukina leaned back against the tree. "Lean. So, what's new and exciting?"

Ruri chuckled. "My father is taking me horseback riding on Satuday."

"SUGOI!" Yukina leaned forward - even forgetting to say it - eyes as big as saucers. The flying kind. "You're really going horseback riding?!"

"Uhhh...yeah." Ruri looked at her oddly. "Why? What's the big deal?"

"But...didn't you go just a month ago?"

"...Huh?" Ruri hadn't been in this reality - wherever it was - for even three weeks yet, so she certainly couldn't remember something that supposedly happened a month ago.

"You remember, don't you? Just before you had that bad fever. Maybe you're allergic to horses. Or maybe they're allergic to you, and one of them kicked you off and--"

"No, Yukina. It was the flu." She remembered her mother talking about it, a week and a half ago.

"Nod. I remember now. Memory problems, right?" Yukina giggled. "It'll be great for you. Not everyone gets to go horseback riding for the very first time...twice!"

"Ruri-Ruri!" Yurika bounced over to the tree. "I'm here to cheer you up!"

"Glare."

Ruri dropped her chopsticks into the now-empty bento and set it down. "What do you mean, cheer me up?" She suddenly had a bad feeling. Almost any time the Captain attempted to cheer someone up, they generally ended up worse than before she started.

"Well, let me--"

"Don't say it."

"--explain."

* * * * *

Across the schoolyard, Ai perked up an ear.

"Did someone just say..."

* * * * *

Yurika continued. "Ai said you're upset, so I'm going to cheer you up. We're going to go to a movie on Saturday night at the ND, or maybe do some more karaoke. You don't have to sing--"

Ruri shook her head. "No thank you."

"Huh?"

"Father is taking me horseback riding on Saturday."

"What?" Yurika looked quite upset. "What's up with that?"

"My father rarely has a chance to spend any time with me."

"But he's not really your father!"

Ruri winced, and glanced rather pointedly at Yukina. Yurika, being Yurika, completely missed the hint.

"I mean, really, Ruri. He's just a shadow! A figment of someone's--"

Ruri leaped to her feet, her face just inches away from Yurika's.

"I live with him. I know he's busy, and it's hard for him to spend time with me. But I still live under his roof. He and Mom still think about me and try their hardest!" Her voice rose to a shout. "And I don't need you being selfish and trying to detract from that! Yurika no BAKA!" The last was spat out venomously. She turned and stomped towards the school building.

Yurika blinked, an expression akin to shell-shock on her face. Yukina waved a hand in front of her eyes.

"Ummm...you in there?"

Ai quickly jogged up. "What happened? I heard Ruri screaming all the way across the yard. What exactly did you just explain?"

Yurika blinked. "All I did was tell her we were going to the movies..."

"Snort. And told her her parents were imaginary." Yukina looked rather disgusted with the whole issue. She bent over and picked up Ruri's bento and chopsticks. "Grab. I'd better get these back to her. Ja ne!"

Ai watched the younger girl run off and sighed. "Yurika...Fom now on, leave the explanations to the experts, okay?"

"Well, I was just trying to help her. So I decided we'd go to the movies."

Ai shook her head in disgust. "Best we can do now is try to convince Yukina that you're not a raving loony."

"What about Ruri?"

Ai glared at her. "Don't you think that enough damage has been done there?"

* * * * *

The walls were hung with red tapestries, each bearing a silhouette of an insect. A massive marble scarab, carved to accomodate a person, stood as a throne. On either side of the throne was a brazier, and in front of it, a low-set crystal ball.

"Akara."

A dark misty form with crimson eyes rose from one of the braziers.

"What is the cause of the delay?"

Prince Akara was seated in the throne, as usual. But he shivered before this ebon form.

"The Martian Successors have returned from the dead. My generals appear helpless before them, and one turned against me. He had to be destroyed."

"I want results. Not excuses. I need more power, if I am to make this permanent. Otherwise, it could all destabilize."

"Permanent, My Lord?"

"It need not concern you. Just realize, that if I fail...you die. There are no shades of grey. There is no escape."

Akara nodded. "Yes, My Lord. I shall begin taking a personal hand in the issue."

* * * * *

Second to last class for Ruri was Home Economics. Normally, she enjoyed this class. Today, however, she was less than thrilled.

It mostly had to do with the fact that today, she and Yurika were partners.

Given Yurika's culinary expertise, this would normally be merely intolerable. Given the fact that she was currently very upset with her, it became horrid. And as if things couldn't get worse, for some reason, Akito was a guest teacher today...

"Akito! You've gotta try this!"

"Akito! Try mine!"

Ruri sighed. Why was it, wherever she went, the entire female population was quickly smitten with Tenkawa Akito?

"Akito...Someone has used all of my curry."

Herself included.

"Oh, I'm sorry, Ruri." Yurika leaned over to her. "But I used it to spice up this fudge."

"I stand corrected. Someone who can't cook has used all of my curry."

Akito walked over. "Be nice, Ruri. It can't be that bad." He turned to Yurika. "Here, let me try some of your fudge."

Yurika bubbled with enthusiasm. "I know you're just gonna love it! Right, Akito?"

Akito lifted a piece of fudge to his mouth.

* * * * *

The quiet of the afternoon was shattered by a piercing scream that seemed to lift the building right off the foundations. Every bird within a half-mile was startled into sudden flight.

* * * * *

Mizutaki-sensei leaned over the prone and plaid- coloured Akito. "Oh, my. He doesn't seem well at all."

Ruri nodded. "It was probably something he ate. Something toxic."

"WAAAHHHHHH!" Yurika ran from the room.

Mizutaki-sensei grabbed his arms and gently helped him to his feet. "If you can hold on for a moment, I'll head down to the nurse's station and get you something."

"A stomach pump?"

"Ruri-chan!" Mizutaki-sensei raised a hand to her cheek. "That's not very nice!"

"Anti-toxin and a jumbo-sized jar of Tums?"

"Actually, I was thinking of Pepto-Bismol." Mizutaki- sensei let go of Akito, who now seemed able to stand on his own, and hurried from the room.

Ruri looked up at Akito. "I'd offer you something of mine, but it's not cooked properly yet. Plus, I don't know if your stomach could handle it after that."

"It could have been worse. Could have been ketchup fudge..."

Megumi stepped up. "Akito-sempai! Would you like some--"

Perhaps it was some sort of residual memory. Something fom the old days, aboard the Nadesico. Or perhaps it was the fact that Megumi's "fudge" looked like it was trying to escape. Either way, the results were the same. Akito turned and ran.

Megumi blinked.

Ruri leaned over. "What exactly is that?"

"Shrimp and garlic fudge, with soya icing."

"...Soya icing?"

"Yeah! I used a whole bottle of soya sauce." She grinned. "It kept the colour."

* * * * *

There was a knock at the nurse's station door.

"Hello?"

The door opened, and Mizutaki-sensei walked in. She jumped, somewhat startled, when she spotted Genichiro.

"Ara...Who are you? Where's the nurse?"

Genichiro glanced over at one of the beds, where the nurse was stretched out, a cold cloth over her eyes. He grinned. "She was...not expecting my arrival." He stood up, and extended a hand towards her.

In the palm of his hand was a miniature Batto.

"Do you like spiders?"

* * * * *

Yurika walked up to Ruri, head hung low. "Ummm...Ruri...I'm really sorry about...what I said...about your parents."

Ruri looked at her.

Yurika started to sweat. "It was really mean. And I shouldn't have said it, okay?"

Ruri looked at her.

Yurika fell to her knees. "I'm really sorry! Please, forgive me."

"Apology accepted."

Yurika jumped to her feet. "I'm so happy!" She grabbed a dish from the counter. "Have some fudge?"

"Uh--"

It was at this time that the monster decided to smash through the wall.

The first thought through Ruri's mind was, `Thank you, Kami-sama, for not making me eat the fudge.'

The Golem turned and swung an arm at Ruri. The arm ended with what looked like an axe, or...a meat cleaver? Ruri dived out of the way.

"Ruri..." The monster snarled at her. It swung again, and again, Ruri managed to just barely avoid its swing. But now, she was backed into a corner, with nowhere left to run. The Golem swung again...

"Rocket Punch!"

A large, blue-and-pink armoured fist slammed into the Golem, smashing it into the far wall. Luckily, most of the students had vacated the Home Ec room when the Golem had first attacked. The fist snaked back along a cable, and reconnected itself to the massive suit of armour standing at the Golem-made hole.

"How did it know who I am?"

"Ruri! Get youself and Yurika out of here!"

Ruri nodded, and grabbed Yurika. "Let's get somewhere out of sight. Now."

Yurika nodded. "No problem."

* * * * *

"Mars Guardian, Make-UP!"

The light seared her eyes, all blue and gold. The air around her rippled, and she felt waves of incredible heat pounding her. Her clothes shredded and re-formed into the blue skirt, tight-fitting golden bodysuit and long blue boots and gloves. The tiara formed on her brow, and the Henshin lengthened to quarterstaff proportions.

Ruri stepped back into the Home Ec room, Yurika on one side and Ai on the other. Yurika struck a silly pose and opened her mouth to speak, but before she could say anything, Ruri popped a piece of fudge into her mouth.

"Have some fudge."

Ai looked at the suddenly-disabled Yurika. "That wasn't too smart. We might have needed her."

Ruri scanned the wreckage of the room. Tuxedo Ken had not been idle while they were gone; most of the features of the room had been demolished. A roughly Golem-shaped hole in the wall told her that the fight had been taken outside.

"Let's go."

The two surviving Martian Successors stepped outside, to see Tuxedo Ken being knocked about the schoolyard. With more room to maneuver, the Golem had a decided advantage against him.

"Pepper bomb attack!" The Golem launched a small stream of packets at Tuxedo Ken. They exploded on impact, filling the air with a dark powder. Tuxedo Ken staggered back, his armour dissolving, and fell to the ground, clutching his eyes.

Ruri glanced over at Ai. "Is it the same as the others?"

Ai scanned the creature with her computer. "Yes. Some variation in pattern, like all of them, but the same trick should work."

"When will they learn? Distortion Field!" Ruri spun the staff in front of her. A glowing blue cloud formed all around her, then stabilized into a light blue sphere.

Ai summoned her hammer, jumped up to the school wall, and ran along its length until she had positioned the Golem between herself and Ruri.

The Golem had turned from Tuxedo Ken and was flailing impotently against the Distortion Field. From within it, Ruri peppered it with plasma pistol fire, but to no avail. Ai nodded to herself. "Good, Ruri. Very good."

She leaped back down to the ground. "Particle Blast!" She swung the hammer, as though to throw it, and it blazed a bright golden. A crescent-shaped beam of energy formed, and flew across the room to slam into the Golem.

The Golem struck Ruri's Distortion Field, and Mizutaki- sensei, their cooking teacher, bounced off of it. The Batto that was possessing her fell inside the Field.

Ruri blinked. "I guess it didn't have time to properly fuse with her. Oh well...It's been a while since I fried one of these." She took careful aim, and pulled the trigger.

* * * * *

Genichiro scowled as the Batto was vaporized. "Damn...mission failed, and no energy gathered at all." He sighed. "Prince Akara will not be happy with this at all..."

* * * * *

Ruri opened her bedroom door and picked up Omoikane. She dropped into her beanbag chair, hugging the cat.

"Omoikane...Who am I?"

* * * * *

Author's Notes:

Yeah, the battle was rather contrived, rather not well written, rather rushed...We ran out of time. We had characterization elements to wrestle with in this episode, and it took up much of our allotted time. Ah, well...Tail Kinker hates writing combats anyway. :)

Footnote 1: The mention of Ruri's fever was in Episode 5.

Kudos to Kitsy for the very delicately handled rant from Ruri. Would you like fries with that?

Our apologies to Inoue Kikuko. Wow, we kept it down to only one (extra) copyright infringement/insult/spare crossover!

Due to some technical difficulties (largely Microsoft- based), Kitsy was forced to reformat her hard drive. Therefore, the mailing list was lost. Luckily, the MGPR stuff was backed up. :) But we would appreciate it if all the people who were on the mailing list would resubscribe. This time, though, you can send your subscription notices to Kitsy.

Comments and Criticism can be sent to tailkinker@home.com or to kitsy@home.com. This story tends to be archived at both www.geocities.com/groves_ca and members.home.net/kitsy. Finally, there is a mailing list associated with this story. To subscribe, send mail to kitsy@home.com with `subscribe MGPR' as the subject.